Taken for granted

anupa
Sir i am very fond of helping others and so many of my friends take me for granted..i do know to say 'NO'.but my problem is i get carried away so much by their decisions that i never take my own decision.i know what is right and what is wrong but i feel they must be more right.ultimately i feel regretted for not taking my decision.i think im losing my self respect.plss help me sir.im in great distress

Baladheepak AC

Telling the truth, I too am changing from a position similar to yours.

I used to feel that whatever the other person's stand is, it would be better than mine or right - and mine is wrong.

The truth is I was right most of the times.

Being a human, I was wrong some times too.

How did I change?

I targeted small assignments and victories. These gave me a confidence that 'I too can be right'. These small acts brought better changes.

I stopped thinking that every situation is an opportunity.

I started spotting opportunities which shall bring me recognition - for a simple reason that my self-esteem should be repaired and should be high.

Later, I thought about those people who helped me have a good self image. I spent more time with them.

I lived a better life. I designed better days.

These are tips what I can give you.

See how you can design your days better.

Share with others; let's see how your days can be designed better.

After that, once you shed doubts on yourself, definitely, your self-confidence would stabilise. When your confidence is stabilised, then, when all the doubts on yourself would cease, then the decisions what you take would be right - rather, you would be able to take right decisions.

Helping others is not wrong. At the same time, we must know whom to help and when to. Definitly not to the extent of our being taken for granted.

All the best.

I'm a topper - that's the problem

FAIZA
Hello Baladheepak It’s a wonderful job that you are doing here! I have got a problem and I would like to know how you would have resolved it, had it been your problem!I actually don’t know if it is even a problem at all so let me first ask you if it’s a real problem that need to be resolved. Is it a bad thing that you are good in studies, have confident and are preferred by the teacher over the others?I know that for sure that I never pose or pretend to be, “miss know it all” but that’s exactly what I get to hear. Even my friends say this to me all the time that you are proud!!! This is posing quiet a problem for me; especially my male friends find it hard to tolerate my proud nature (this is what they say)

Baladheepak AC : This is a situation which would voice the top rank holders of 75% of the people in any educational instituation.
It is quite natural for the humans to compare.
By comparing, we normally lose equilibrium. When you study well and are praised for that, others start feeling an envy - cos, their immediate thought is that they are inferior to you.
Because of the reason that you made them feel this, you would be in the not-so-favourite list. Now, since you cannot be in the not-so-fav.. list of the teachers, your peers make a note to mark you in that list of theirs.
This is the answer to the first part of your question.
Baladheepak Ac

Trip to Scotland - 3THINGS TO REMEMBER

Mr.Ganesh,
Good to hear about your trip.
Unlike the normal "Wish you a happy journey" Mail, I wish to share a few things which would make your trip a successful one.

1. Remember your Roots - Most of the people who travel abroad, develop a fancy thinking that the other country's culture is great and that ours is not. This is hated by any person who knows about culture. Such exhibitionism isn't tolerated by decent people who have realised the value of tradition and ethics. Please stick to your culture and tradition and treat the people in the other country with the same courtesy as how you would like to treat your family.
2. Utilise your Privileges - The underprivileged compared to you can gain a lot from the experience and exposure of your foreign travels. I direct my friends to keep an open eye so that the umpteen number of opportunities from various sources can be introduced to people here. Those who are alert would definitely be ready to grab.
3. The Most Important Thing - is to remember that you are with your family and if your wife is home maker, she would expect you to return back in time. Spend quality time with your family.

Apart from this, I would tell you two things. Mails of quality shall be forwarded to you and My prayers for a safe and successful trip.

May God be with you,
Baladheepak AC

On 10/4/07, Ganesh Kumar. Sundar <Ganesh_Sundar@infosys.com> wrote:

Dear All,

It's a real surprise and also am really happy to say that i have got a Offer from my company - project Trip to Scotland .

I will be travelling to Scotland, Edinburgh for a Long Term Assignment for 1 year with my family .

As i am travelling on this Sunday, October 7th Early Morning 6.30, i want to inform all of you well in advance

Keep in touch and keep sending mails.

Baladheepak AC
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Silly mistake in the examination

Anupa : Sir im a final year chemistry student..recently i faired a bit poorly in my viva and i was sooo disappointed that i messed up with my practicals soon after that.the mistake was soooo silly to mention..it shows i was absent minded somewhere.why do i behave so?..and how should i get out of it?..pllss i need ur help..

Baladheepak AC :
Anupa, you are a final year chemistry student. Can you help me with this problem?

I have an equation which people claim is correct.

I have a doubt coz the molecular strengths(! I hope the term is right)of the left hand side and right hand side are not equal.

Can this equation be considered as right?

We both know that it cannot be considered so.

What is the reason?The stability is challenged - right?

If an equation is carefully noticed for its stability - we have to understand how important it is to see, notice and carefully watch the stability of humans.

This starts from the mind.

If a small mistake of yours is going to be the focus, all the right things you do and the general agility of yours are out of focus.

So, keep yourself totally upon the situation (either it is a practical working, or theoratical problem..) and go according to the protocol.

If your professor has given a set of proceedures for you to go by, follow that without any intrusions in the mind.

As a guide, I remind you of the umpteen opportunities which are available in this world which you would be facing and taking up in the future.

If you are not a clearhead, then, those opportunities might not be addressed successfully.

1.Learn from the problem.

2.Know why you went off balance.

3.Become more interested in the subject - even unconsciously you should do things right.

Baladheepak AC